Mukoma wa Ngugi, the fourth-born son of the late legendary Kenyan writer Ngugi wa Thiong’o, has come forward to speak publicly about a long-standing family feud that deeply affected his relationship with his father.
He revealed that they had been estranged for the past four years and that he was not even aware of his father’s death until he was informed by one of his brothers.
According to Mukoma, if his sibling hadn’t called him, he would have found out about Ngugi wa Thiong’o’s death on social media, just like any other member of the public. This alone, he says, reflects the extent of the emotional and physical distance that had developed between him and his father.
In a heartfelt reflection, Mukoma admitted that the true goodbye to his father had happened years ago, long before his passing on Wednesday, May 28.
The root of their fallout, he explained, stemmed from a troubling incident in the past where Ngugi allegedly assaulted his mother, Nyambura wa Ngugi. Since then, the bond between father and son deteriorated significantly, leaving them unable to reconcile.
Mukoma revealed he was also not informed about his father’s cremation until after it had already taken place. “If my brother hadn’t told me, I would have found out from social media.
I wasn’t even aware of the cremation; I wasn’t part of it,” he shared. The cremation took place quietly in the United States on Thursday, attended only by close family members.
He described his relationship with Ngugi wa Thiong’o as far from ideal, saying it lacked the affection and connection many would expect between a father and son.
Mukoma acknowledged that their final years together were marked more by silence and emotional distance than by moments of joy or reconciliation.
Despite their strained relationship, Mukoma expressed love and respect for his father. He credited Ngugi for shaping him into someone who values truth and integrity, saying that no matter the tension, he will always acknowledge him as his father.
“All I can say is that I love him. And despite everything, he is my father. No family is without its conflicts,” he said sincerely.
Ngugi wa Thiong’o’s death was initially announced by his daughter, Wanjiku wa Ngugi, who called on the public to honour and celebrate her father’s life and literary legacy.
The family has since planned multiple memorial events in different parts of the world, including in Nairobi, to pay tribute to the iconic author and his contributions to African literature.
Mukoma’s honest revelation sheds light on the personal side of a man who, to the world, was a literary giant, but within his own family, faced complex challenges and unresolved conflicts.
His words echo the reality that even public figures can have deeply personal and painful family struggles behind closed doors.
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